‘Oh that’s too much praise for a guy for me. Stop, stop please. There’s really no need.’ I ran out of breath laughing
‘So where was I again? Oh yeah, yes how I got into this business again. The summer of 2003, with that unforgettable, sickening heat of it. Mom and father were still fighting after that whole scandal they got in. They tried mending it with some good old Italian family vacation. We landed in Rome 10 months before the divorce.’
‘No, no I already had enough wine tonight. Not good for my body at this stage.’
‘On our third day it turned out dad got sick. Must have been the cheap shrimp he had. So mom and I went out to explore the city on our own. And I don’t remember exactly why, but I was even worse than usual. And I told you, I think on our third meeting, how much of a brat I was back then. So at some point mom snapped, and she started beating me in the street. Through the sharp pain, through mom’s shouting and weeping and my own cries and the screams of the onlookers who cared enough to look, do you know what I still remember?”
The laugh I give my comrade is loud enough to be heard from the street. “Not that, but good guess. It was the statue we were in front of. Like a giant gazing down at his favourite sheep. When I looked into its eyes, I felt a sort of, I’m not sure even now, admiration. Like whoever it was based on deserved completely to have a statue made after him. But then I got too scared and started crying even louder.’
‘No no, come on dude, you know it is awkward when you offer a shoulder to cry on, or whatever.’
‘But yes, that is what I think was the reason I got passionate about history as I grew up. I chose my degree because of the random spot my mom picked to slap my ass one day. Really shows what sharp mind I got.’
‘Although you are right. Wouldn’t have gotten the chance to meet you otherwise. What were you doing there in Greece anyways. Broadly I mean. Even if I am curious how you got stuck in that vase too.’
‘Jesu-, almost forgot.’ I laugh, much more high-pitched than before
‘You aren’t fucking with me? I know of what you did before, but I thought you left it less recently. No offense I hope, you’re still my pal, just a surprise.’
‘ Even then, that seems a little extreme. Not disproportionate, just doing all of that seems unhealthy for your sanity.’
‘I’m not sure if I agree with that man. I hate mom, I hate dad. But if their souls are as rotten and black as you say, then...’ I sigh, swallowing down a glass of vodka to untangle the soul. ‘Then I think my soul would be even worse.’
‘Not rotten enough to take that effort tho. Worse than joining the military. You really need to stop trying it. Or at least put a few more zeros behind that number.’
‘Paying for my trip somewhere you want isn’t a replacement, cheapsake.’ I rub my shoulder after the punch. I like how warm it got. ‘Thanks for showing you listen to my work talk, however. Most people couldn’t even pronounce the town's name.’
‘No, no, go on. Elaborate on you’d get me back with her.’ I take the cup of wine and press it to his lips. ‘Don’t be shy, man.’
‘Sorry, sorry got to me. But admit it, you deserved a little teasing for all you did to me tonight.’
‘Oh shit. I get it now. You think there’s something in that town that’ll help you get with your own ex, huh. But you aren’t sure exactly what, or you got a travel restriction there, so you want my help?’
I grab the fire extinguisher.
‘Calm your tits down now! If even a table leg here gets burn-marks I’m gonna end up homeless dude. Can’t I fucking make a guess in my own bloody house with you around?’
‘Fuck off then!’
I slam the door in my ‘friends’ face as fast as I can. As it closes the red light dies down, sunset ends and the night begins. I begin cleaning the floor with a mop and throw the candles into the trash. The book makes a thump as it hits the wall after being thrown.
‘One day I’m going to be done with him. Maybe even give him what he wants, take that shitty offer.’
‘Piece of shit buddy you are Mister Light-bringer.’